Thursday, December 07, 2006

A Post From I. Myte's Serious Friend, Stefano
I’m readin’ stuff and I see that 50 cents, is that his name, is attacking Oprah for being white.
Or something like that. I guess he said that, on her show and elsewhere, she’s been catering to middle-class white women for so long that now she’s become a middle-class white woman herself.
And further said that rap music is mostly written by blacks and latinos, from their perspective, and that this is a perspective that Oprah no longer shares.
Hmmm. These things that 50 sense has said are not nearly as virulent as the mindless tirades of Mel Gibson and Michael Richards.
But ya know what. I still think his comments are bigoted.
And, if not bigoted, they are certainly divisive and counter-productive for the world we all live in.
Let’s break it down as the young people say. We are all part of a free society in 2006, and are all part of a world that we are working to make freer and freer. A world where people define themselves by their free thought and their free actions.
So, essentially, it’s completely out of step with the times for someone to be defined by their race alone. And it’s way, way out of step for someone to attempt to define somebody else by race.
Oprah is a human being, part of the human race. And for Half Dollar to try and say there is a certain way she ought to act in order for her to be part of Half Dollar’s race is really pretty screwed up.
She’s of African descent period. And proud of it, God bless her. And for someone to say she’s not black because she doesn’t act right! Well. Ya know what. If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s probably a duck.
And what the man is saying is bigoted. Period. Even if you make it up to 75 cents or even a dollar, don’t be going around defining someone racially because you don’t like the way they act or talk.
Another thing too, coin man. As for Oprah not sharing the perspective of rappers. Umm. Maybe if you stop and think about the garbage you peddle, you’d see that she probably feels, along with many people of all races, that the rap perspective is all too often a perspective that is a bum’s perspective that demeans and degrades rather than uplifts, that damages instead of builds, and that is inimical to the interests of my race.
And your race too. The human race. Get a clue.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

I. MYTE SAYS NO WAY HIMBLOW-AY

Wow. I don't know about you. But that was bringin' me down a little.
And really I had to stop the fat fuck before ...
..., well. Before he went and advertised his damned newsletter. That's what he was about to do.
And hell. If you really want to have him arm you with the truth or whatever, you can find his large sorry ass on the web somewhere.
I'll be damned if anyone's gonna be monetizin' my blog but me.
Damn ! Now I wish that hard shank had gone a little farther right the other day.
Okay. I'm outa here. I gotta go work on a film. Later.

BUSH HIMBLOW WEIGHS IN

Hi friends. Bush Himblow here. I have a few thoughts I’d like to share with you.
Now friends. I know you’re probably tired by now. Tired as a fat right wing commmentator after a stressful drug smuggling run. Tired of all the noise and nonsense of this political season.
But folks. As tired as we may all be of the shrill, insane cacophony that is the leftist, liberal, secular, progressive, badminton-playing death machine, it’s especially important that you perk your ears up now.
For, friends, if you care about this country, if you care about decency, if you care about defeating evil decisively once and for all, I urge you to hang in there a few more days. I urge you to hang on my every word.
For you know I’m the truth. It’s not for nothing that I’m the most feared and targeted man in America.
Yes! You didn’t hear me wrong. Targeted!! Because you know, friends. If the namby-pamby, child-molesting liberals some how found enough cajones to form death squads, don’t you just know that ole Bush Himblow, yours truly, would be big, immense target numero uno.
Yes folks, I put myself on the line every day. For you! For ordinary, regular, God-fearing people like you. And like me too, accept I have more money and am allowed to take as many pain killers as I want.
Okay. Now that I’ve got your attention let me get even more of your attention. Here it goes.
Friends. This election is the most decisive election in all of human history. Make no mistake! If the liberal, leftist, cannibalistic caballos of cornucopistic flim- flammery win, it is a very safe bet that you and your children will either be dead, or in jail, or the love slaves of someone named Abdullah.
Now, you may ask, how do you know that it is this serious, Bush? Well. Ole Bushie is gonna tell you, though it should be searingly self-evident.
Have ya noticed? Have ya noticed what’s goin’ on? Do you think that it’s an accident that the leftfieldos have pulled out all the stops, brought in the big guns.
Case in point. You’ve probably all seen it by now. That Teen Wolf kid jumpin’ all over and wavin’ around. Tryin’ to get us off guard with his fakery into voting to allow scientists to mate our God fearing nubile daughters with salmon and things even worse than that with their unholy, half-witted experiments.
And don’t get me started. These scientists, these twisted, unGodly, dark geniuses with all sorts of God knows what in their evil bag of tricks, how on earth could it be an accident that a good man like Chuck Heston came down with that ‘disease’?
Accident? Happenstance? Noooooo!
Friends. I put forth here and now, that the Teen Wolf and his evil, fantasy-weaving cohorts and hench men, in cahoots with the Godless scientists, are making up new diseases every day. And the reason for this is that they want to tax us, and tax us and tax us.
And then enslave us!!!
Folks. Do you want to live the rest of your lives in a desert concentration camp run by lab coated, coke bottle glasses wearing, Birkenstock shod fiends?
No!! Of course not!
But that’s what’s going on. That’s why Wolf Boy was out there waving his arms around like that with his made up disease.
To play on your sympathy, get you off guard and then it’s too late. The steel trap has closed!!!
What’s that you say, friends? That maybe old Bush Himblow has gotten himself worked up over nothing?
Well, let me just ask you to do this. All I want you to do is watch. Mark my words. In the next few days, Wolf Boy is gonna seem like patty cake!
I predict. That in the next few days. As sure as the rain on the apples in Minneapolis in the green summer, a big “star”, someone, say, on the order of a Yul Brynner. They’ll be coming out and saying they’ve got cancer or something and that tobacco is bad for you … And from there it’ll be …
Um. Hold on. Folks. While I was writing this entry the producer of my radio show was looking over my shoulder. And he’s just informed that Yul Brynner is dead.
Yes. Yul Brynner is dead.
As if confirmation of all I’ve been saying could be any more heaven sent.
One of these big shot Hollywood guys has gone too far, revealing their whole sordid game.
Faking his own death!!! Will they stop at nothing to ensure that American Cub Scouts end up being sodomized in madrassas far from their apple cobbler shores????!!!!
All right friends. Now that it is crystal clear to you that everything I think, say and do is THE TRUTH, I need you to do something for me.
Do this for me. And I will arm you. I will prepare you. I will give you what you need to defend your hearth and your home against the coming onslaught of lefto, crazo, Arabo, Koreano, homosexual, feminist attackery.

I. Myte Returns


Hey everybody. It's been a while, huh? Sorry. I mean I've really wanted to get into this blog shi, er, stuff and well ...
... ya know what it is? I've been busy.
I mean after all, I'm a great big film maker. And that's very demanding. In fact. I've been out, um.
Out um.
Out scouting locations.
Yea. That's it.
Well anyhow. I'm back. And I'm lookin' forward to bloggin' my ass off.
In the meantime, here's something you might find interesting. It'll be the next entry. Now, there was a lot of stuff that friends and the like sent in for me to post while I was gone. And most of it sucked, so. Screw it.
Anyhow this one I'll post.
It's from a buddy. He's kind of a dick, but I still like him sort of. You'll probably know him right away.
Yes, he's one of my celeb friends. Heavy set fella. Shoots his mouth off a lot. And boy, was he sure shootin' it off just before the recent elections.
Enjoy. And good to see ya all again.